Balancing….Life

Most of you know I’m a LuLaRoe Retailer.

Two months ago, I started on this quest to sell a certain number of pieces every month so I could get a “prize”. For most retailers, this goal is an easy one. For me, not so much. For two months I KILLED myself. I went live every night, I pushed every.single.day. I don’t have a ton of people in my Facebook Group, and I would feel guilty when the same handful would help me reach my goal; like, why can’t the other 600 people in this group see me? Am I really that awful? I know I don’t have a ton of inventory but darn.

I feel even more guilty NOW. I’m not going to lie, I had a total mental breakdown at the end of April. Hubby is retiring from the military, we are moving, I was exhausted. I couldn’t clean the house and take care of the kids and make 900 outfits and answer 900 questions and have people bombard me every day with hows and whats and whys and OMG my head just…..exploded.

I had to step back. At first I thought I was going to quit, then I decided to downsize. I don’t want to quit. I’ve made an amazing “family” outside of my own. Women I can turn to who love me and who I love back. Women who push me and drive me nuts but who I wouldn’t trade for the world. This group of women have become an outlet for me in an otherwise “what’s my purpose?” life.

I BELIEVE my purpose, right now, at this season in my life, is to be a LLR retailer.

BUT

I also believe my purpose is to be a mother and a wife. And those two things will ALWAYS come first.

So, I’m not going live every night anymore. I’m pushing during the day, when my kids are at school. I still want that goal for my group. But life has to be a balance; at least mine does, or {insert another mental breakdown here.}

I don’t want to let my ladies down, but I also don’t want to let my kids/hubby down. Do I want to sell clothing and make women feel beautiful? Absolutely, I LOVE doing that, it’s something I never thought I’d be doing, but I am and it brings me a ton of joy. But I also want to be a mom and a wife. I also want to have a tidy house (not clean clean….have you met Lincoln and Audrie??) I want to move to a new state without being completely overwhelmed with “what if I don’t sell anything for a week or two??”

I don’t have assistants. My husband doesn’t to help, it’s not his bag. I know I have customers who are more than willing to help me. And while I appreciate that so, so much, this is my baby. And I’d like to be able to raise it the way that I see fit.

I enjoy going live, I enjoy making outfits. I enjoy answering questions and helping women find their sizes. But I also enjoy watching Lincoln ramp after school. I enjoy helping Audrie make her craft of the day. I can be BOTH retailer and mother.

But for me, the balance will always shift to mother and wife. If that means I don’t reach my goal because I would rather be outside playing with my kids instead of finding a new way to sell or reaching new people, then so be it.

I don’t want to feel like I let my customers down.

But you better believe I wouldn’t be able to handle it if I let my kids, my husband, and myself down.

We all balance life in different ways. “Busy” for one is “bored” for another.

I will sell LLR until I can’t anymore. I may make it “bigger” one day, I may not. But as long as my ladies are around, and as long as I need LLR (I mean, face it, I still buy A LOT of it), I’m staying around.

Just don’t expect me to burn myself out. You won’t see me on a live sale crying my eyes out because I’m exhausted and sad. I don’t need the pity train anymore. I need the “she’s strong as hell and look at her go, balancing life like a champ” train.

And I need my ladies to get on it with me.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

w

Connecting to %s